Monday, November 26, 2007

i know. i said i would post inside shots on thanksgiving. it's now monday. so obviously, i lied.

here they are:

and from this weekend, pizza from nice slice in providence! we got half pesto and tomato (the pesto was a spicy chipotle pesto and it was awesome!) and half earth crisis (tomatoes, spinach, artichokes). so good. god, i love pizza.

anyway, michael and i had a second thanksgiving on sunday and made the cassoulet from veganomicon, corn spoon bread, apple pecan stuffing (both from deots 2), and jess' mom's sweet potato pie casserole. everything was really yummy!

Wednesday, November 21, 2007


so i got the great idea to make smaller pies since there will only be 5 or 6 people coming over for dessert tomorrow and everyone wanted something different. i have three sizes of tart pans, so i thought i would just keep re-using the smallest one to make each pie. i started with the pecan. some of the pecan goo got between the crust and the pan and glued it to the side. so. there went that idea.

i now have three completed pies in three diffrent sizes.

from smallest to largest, i give you thanksiving dessert!
todd x's vegan pecan pie

bryanna clark grogan's pumpkin pie as found here

and isa chandra moskowitz's chocolate smlove pie

tomorrow i will post some inside shots. happy thanksgiving!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

i am exhausted.

i just baked at least a dozen of each of six kinds of cookies for etsy orders.

i made: chocolate chip, peanut butter chocolate chip, chocolate peanut butter shells, oatmeal, pear pecan, and pumpkin chip cookies.

but the cookies are done and i will be able to get them out into the mail tomorrow and avoid the holiday rush on friday.

so go me!

tomorrow night: thanksgiving baking! pumpkin, pecan, and chocolate smlove pies!

Monday, November 19, 2007

my dad's birthday was yesterday. we went to see one of the after dark horrorfest movies and afterwards, he came to my house for some dinner. i made one of the meals out of the voluptuous vegan by myra kornfeld:
amaranth-studded cornbread, cranberry relish with apples & pears, sweet dumpling squash (i used gold nugget squash) with chestnut stuffing and lima bean gravy, sauteed haricots verts with horseradish, and fennel, orange, & pomegranate salad.

despite all the yummy sounding names, everything except the salad was kind of blah. i guess i should have been forewarned - lima bean gravy is about as good as you would expect something called lima beans gravy to be.

but the salad was fantastic. and my dad loved everything, so i can't say the dinner was a bust or anything.

for dessert, a litterbox cake, originally mentioned by joanna on the ppk.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

my friend scott had a cookout this weekend. to be fair, he came right out and told me it was a cookout. i took the liberty of assuming that something got lost in translation (he's canadian) and what he meant was they would be cooking on the grill and someone would be running in and out of the house while the rest of us stayed toasty warm inside. nope. he meant outside.
there was nothing vegan about the sixteen pounds of meat on the grill, so i brought my own stuff for everyone to enjoy.
here is my list of what to bring to a cookout in the middle of november:
kettle chips salt and pepper chips. subtle, potato-y, peppery, salty yummy goodness.
hummus and pita. duh.
chips and salsa. again, duh.
baked beans.
cauliflower pot pie with olive crust from 'nomicon

for dessert, hot chocolate snuggles (they're basically chocolate snickerdoodles, but michael gave them the snuggles name and i think it's cute) and lower fat chocolate cake from 'nomicon.

for breakfast this morning, i brought hawaiian bread from DEOTS 2. but, like last time, it was eaten before i got a chance to take a picture. that stuff is so amazing.

hot chocolate snuggles (sorry, we ate them before i took photos! they're good though. and they look like chocolate snickerdoodles!)
1 cup margarine
1 1/2 cups granulated white sugar
1 tsp vanilla
4 tbsp soy milk mixed with 2 tbsp cornstarch
2 1/3 cups unbleached white flour
2/3 cups cocoa powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp cornstarch

2 tbsp cinnamon
4 tbsp granulated white sugar
2 tbsp brown sugar

Preheat your oven to 300 F.
Cream the margarine and sugar together until smooth. Add the vanilla, and the cornstarch/soymilk mixture, and beat until well-mixed.
Add flour, cocoa, baking powder, salt, and cornstarch.
In a small bowl mix together the granulated sugar, cinnamon and brown sugar.

Begin rolling the cookie dough into smallish balls. Roll each ball in the cinnamon/sugars mixture until completely coated and place on an ungreased baking sheet. Continue until all the dough is used up. Using the bottom of a glass, press down on each ball until they are about an inch thick. Bake for 12 minutes or so. Let cool on the pans for about 5 minutes, and then transfer to a wire baking rack and let cool completely.

Friday, November 16, 2007

because i'm a follower - not a leader!

1. Favorite non-dairy milk?

soymilk. right now? chocolate peppermint vitasoy. and chocolate banana over the summer. but just plain ole soymilk for a non-holiday specialty

2. What are the top 3 dishes/recipes you are planning to cook?
i'm excited to make some stuffed squash and the fixins out of the voluptuous vegan for my dad's birthday on sunday.
bbq seitan sandwiches from 'nomicon
and todd x's pecan pie

3. Topping of choice for popcorn?
EB and salt.

4. Most disastrous recipe/meal failure?
disasterous is such a harsh word. there are things i've thrown out, but nothing that i would consider a disaster. i have to say, i can't get into the 'nomicon chickpea cutlets. i know it's me since everyone else in the world loves them, but i just can't make them taste like anything other than meat bubblegum.

5. Favorite pickled item?
pickles. der.

6. How do you organize your recipes?
there are cookbooks strewn about my kitchen and hiding in cabinets. i have things bookmarked on my computer and things that i make up myself are stored either in my head or, if i'm not feeling lazy, on an index card in my recipe box.

7. Compost, trash, or garbage disposal?
trash, recycling, and compost in the summer.

8. If you were stranded on an island and could only bring 3 foods…what would they be (don’t worry about how you’ll cook them)?
TLTs with extra mayo.
tofutti pizza

9. Fondest food memory from your childhood?
my grandma's mac n cheese

10. Favorite vegan ice cream?
i don't really like ice cream, but if i have to choose one, i like eating the cobbler out of temptation's peach cobbler.

11. Most loved kitchen appliance?
SPOON! spoon is the name of my favoritest wooden spoon. oh spoon, how i love yooooooou!

12. Spice/herb you would die without?

13. Cookbook you have owned for the longest time?
hmn. i just cleaned out a bunch of cookbooks i don't use anymore. so i guess the oldest one i've got now would be 'how it all vegan' by sarah kramer

14. Favorite flavor of jam/jelly?
forest berry. made by swiss people.

15. Favorite vegan recipe to serve to an omni friend?
cookies. and cupcakes. but mostly cookies.

16. Seitan, tofu, or tempeh?
TEMPEH! all the way. then tofu. sometimes seitan.

17. Favorite meal to cook (or time of day to cook)?
brunch is nice because it feels very unrushed.

18. What is sitting on top of your refrigerator?
phonebooks, steve's lunchbox, a pirate, an oversized clothespin, and a basket full of bread, pita, cookies, some nut snack-things

19. Name 3 items in your freezer without looking.
cauliflower, tofu, tofutti pizza

20. What’s on your grocery list?
i went shopping this morning, so nothing right now.

21. Favorite grocery store?
shop rite is close. i wish the health shoppe was more consistent with what they had. whole foods is nice, but far and too fucking expensive. i was totally digging fred meyer when we were in fairbanks. i wish we had a decent farmer's market all year.

22. Name a recipe you’d love to veganize, but haven’t yet.
cheese. and also my mom's zucchini bread. it's easy, but i've just been too lazy to veganize it.

23. Food blog you read the most (besides Isa’s because I know you check it every day). Or maybe the top 3?
i check cake maker to the stars, get sconed, and dont eat off the sidewalk every day. tere are others too, but you asked for three.

24. Favorite vegan candy/chocolate?
i don't really like candy or chocolate. but if i have to choose, i pick swedish fish.

25. Most extravagant food item purchased lately?
i spent $7 on maybe 2 cups of pecans last week. fucking bastards raised prices for thanksgiving. jesus. other than that, i'm not sure i've bought anything extravagant lately. i got vegan treats two weekends in a row and we ate at candle 79 last weekend, but i didn't pay for that, so i dont know if that counts.

26. What was your favorite food BEFORE becoming veg*n?

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

things that i'm picky about:
tomatoes - if they're going to be raw, they must must MUST be de-snotted. michael had never heard of de-snotting a tomato before he met me, but he also never heard of san fransisco having fog, so what does he know? anyway, de-snotted and chopped small. that's the only way you're getting them in my mouth.

peas - i only like fresh peas. like, right off the vine, fresh. otherwise, keep them away from me. my dad is always astounded that i don't like peas.
me (picking peas out of my food)...
dad: dont you like peas?
me: no
dad: i thought you liked peas!
me: i hate peas. i have never liked peas. we go through this verbatim every time you put peas in something.
dad: oh. i could have sworn you like peas.

raw onions - i don't dislike raw onions, but i can only handle small amounts at a time. i get a headache if i eat too many. i think it has something to do with my sulfur allergy.

olives - see yesterday's post. long story short, i like kalamatas. in stuff.

raisins - evil evil bits of evilness.

grapes - see raisins. also, i like green grapes. michael once asked me if i was in kindergarten because i said i like to eat green grapes with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. jerk. i can fit 36 grapes into my mouth at once. true story.

grape flavored things - gag. they taste like purple. and purple is not a good flavor. gag.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

things i am enjoying as of late:

-the vitasoy holiday flavors. i blew through the summer banana chocolate and strawberry banana flavors in july and august, but i got some holly nog and chocolate peppermint and i can't stop drinking it! silk nog can bite me. holly nog has nutmeg. nutmeg! the world's most perfect spice. and warm chocolate peppermint after work? whoa boy. warm chocolate peppermint brings me to the next thing i like...

-soyatoo. i really only ever liked whipped cream on hot chocolate anyway, so the soyatoo has not been hanging around my house for long. i like to make a small cup of hot chocolate in a huge mug and fill the rest of the mug with whipped cream. and when i'm out of whipped cream? refill!

-baked ziti. see below? 'nuff said.

-candle 79. remember when michael and i went to millenium? remember how we felt like jerks for not really liking it? well, candle 79 kicks millenium's pasty vegan ass all over the place. i should have known that east coast would trump west coast any day. speaking of, i liked their seitan piccata so much that i made my own tonight! see?

-caper berries. i wish i had taken a picture of my piccata from candle 79. so that, one, i could show you side by side photos of mine vs. theirs, but also so that i could show you the caper berry that was on top of the dish. i like capers. i figured one gigantoid caper would be awesome. i popped it in my mouth, bit down and got a mouthful of brine. i don't recommend that. what i do recommend is cutting it up into bits and eating it with dinner. yump!

-olives. i always hated olives. i tried all kinds. black, green, kalamata. i tried canned, jarred, those fancy ones at the "olive bar" at the supermarket. bah, then katie jane put them on pizza when were in chicago. and... i couldn't stop eating them. i still can't eat them plain. and i still only like kalamatas, but it's a start!

Sunday, November 11, 2007

before i went vegan, i used to make baked ziti every chance i got. it was probably one of my favorite things to make because i could throw it together in about 30 minutes and have it ready to eat within an hour. and it was good. so good.

about a year ago, amy's came out with a vegan (and gluten-free!) baked ziti that is pretty kick ass. but it's still nothing like what i used to make.

in may, i finally figured out how to remake my old baked ziti in full color veganism. first, i have to thank terry romero for the pine nut cream in veganomicon . without it, this recipe would not exist. this is a very very loose recipe. i don't measure stuff like this out because some days i want things to be saltier or have more tomato chunks or less basil or whatever, so just throw this together according to your tastes:

boil ziti. while its cooking, make 1/2 a recipe of tofu ricotta. feel free to make the ricotta in vegan with a vengeance or make your own. basically, you just need 1/2 a block of tofu and seasonings (you can put in anything you want in any amounts you want, but i think basil, oregano, thyme, and nooch are non-negotiable). next, either make some tomato sauce or open a jar of your favorite spagetti sauce. if you make your own, again all you need is some canned tomatoes, garlic, and spices (again, basil, oregano, and thyme are non-negotiable for me here) and then i add in whatever else i'm in the mood for: olive, capers, roasted red peppers, onions, roasted garlic, whatevs. make a full recipe (or 2) of the pine nut cream. mix 1/2 the pine nut cream with your sauce and tofu ricotta. the mixture should be pretty wet. ***i should note here that i like my baked ziti saucy. as you can see in the pictures, i even put some extra sauce on top. this particular batch had about a jar and a quarter in it. i happened to have a quarter jar in the fridge that i wanted to use up. if i didn't have one open, i don't think i would have bothered with the extra 1/4.*** when the pasta is done cooking, mix it with the cream/tomato sauce mixture. pour it into a 9 x 13 baking dish. pour the rest of the pine nut cream on top and bake until the cream is set (maybe 15 minutes). eat. eat more.

this freezes well, too. awesome.

sorry, for some strange reason i have no pictures of this. maybe i'll whip some up tomorrow if i can find some asceptic silken tofu and i'll add pictures to here. woo!

edited to add the pictures. zomigod. yump!

Saturday, November 10, 2007

my first experience at an all veg restaurant was at veggie heaven in parsippany, nj. i went with my friend paul, who was the first vegan i knew and who was my inspiration to become vegetarian and eventually vegan. actually, the very first vegan food i ate (barring naturally vegan things like fruits, veggies, grains - that kind of thing) was a boca burger at paul's house. it was gross. and i'm still kind of iffy about boca.

anyway, paul used to drive me home from school. instead of bringing me right home, we would go to the photo store and buy a couple rolls of film or ten, go out and shoot them, then grab dinner at veggie heaven. from there, he would either drop me back off at my house or we would go into new york for a movie or something. actually, paul was the first person i went into the city with that wasn't a parent. it was very exciting. we would drive to hoboken (hoboken!) then take the path (the path!) into the village (the village!) and go to the movies. we were very very cool.

the first thing i tried at veggie heaven was the sweet and sour veggie chicken. i loved it and i used to get it all the time. from there i moved onto general tso's veggie chicken and from there i bounced around the menu before settling on my current favorite: veggie chicken with black pepper sauce.

so, hooray for paul for introducing me to veggie heaven and veganism in general and for showing me that it wasn't so hard.

old vs. new, sweet and sour chickn meets chickn with black pepper sauce.

Friday, November 09, 2007

i didn't blog yesterday! i'm a horrible person!

so you get two today. yay you!

i'm going to give you one more autumn cookie recipe today. i need to start experimenting with some winter cookies soon because i went to get them up on etsy at the end of this month, so you'll probably be seeing some of those in the coming weeks, but for now, pumpkin chip cookies.

i apologize for this picture being so ass.

most pumpkin cookies come out very soft because of the pumpkin. they're cakey - more muffin than cookies. adding a little bit of oil helps with this although they're still very soft.


1 c. unbleached sugar
1 c. canned pumpkin
1/2 c. vegan shortening
1/4 c. vegetable oil
2 c. flour
1 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. cinnamon
1/2 tsp. nutmeg
1/2 tsp. ground ginger
1/4 tsp. allspice
1/4 tsp. ground cloves
1/4 tsp. salt
1/2 c. chocolate chips

preheat oven to 375. mix sugar, pumpkin, and shortening. mix in the rest of the stuff. drop by teaspoonfuls onto ungreased cookie sheet, and bake 8-10 minutes. let cool on the pan for 5 minutes. remove to a cooling rack to cool completely

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

apples! fall is awesome.
tonight i wanted to give you all a reason (or several) to go and pre-order joanna's yellow rose recipes from herbivore. i was a tester for joanna and i have to say that i loved pretty much everything i tried and i know that there wasn't anything that i disliked. and joanna's seitan is the only seitan i can get to work consistently for me. it's awesome. and the mustard crusted seitan is one of my all time favorite things. i love that everything in the cookbook is quick and easy and something that didn't make me want to die because i had to make it after work and didn't wind up eating until after 8. nope, joanna's stuff was ready and into my belly within an hour. i really don't think there's much in there that would take longer than that. and all of the recipes are very supermarket friendly. there is nothing in there that you can't get easily. the most "exotic" thing in there was tvp, as far as i remember. it's a really great book and i'm really happy that joanna let me test for it. i'm so excited for it to come out! onto the porn...

the infmaous mustard crusted setitan with bonus sesame green beans on the side. i think this is my favorite meal from the book.

the most beautiful chili you've ever eaten

minestrone soup

baked samosas with mint and mango chutney

goddess salad

corn salsa and spinach dip. i actually ate all of the salsa before my guests came over for the birthday party i made this for. oops.

tofu marsala

artichoke pesto

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

another recipe for you crazy kiddos.

this is another cookie recipe that i made for autumn. pear in a cookie might seem odd, but the flavor is subtle and the cookies are soft and delicious. this recipe is great when you've got one slightly overripe pear hanging around that you don't feel like eating.

pear-pecan cookies

1/2 c. earth balance, softened
1 1/2 c packed brown sugar
egg replacer, equal to one egg - i usually use ener-g for these
1 t vanilla extract
2 c flour
1 1/2 t baking powder
1 t cinnamon
1 t ground ginger
1/2 t nutmeg
1 medium pear, peeled, cored, shredded on a box grater (the biggest holes)
pecan halves

preheat oven to 350 degrees. beat margarine and sugar untill smooth. beat in "egg" and vanilla. add flour, baking powder, cinnamon, and ginger. stir in pears.
drop about two inches apart by rounded tablespoonfuls onto baking sheets and bake 15 minutes or until edges are golden brown and center springs back when lightly touched. cool on pan for 5 minutes. press a pecan half into the center of each cookie. remove to wire racks to cool.

Monday, November 05, 2007

ok, i need to talk about something important tonight.

first and foremost, my friend katie over at don't eat off the sidewalk has published the second issue of her cookzine. it's available now, so go on over and order it. now. i was a tester for this issue and, let me tell you, everything, was wonderful. here are some of the things you'll find inside...
dinner rolls. super easy and fun to use for sloppy joes (or snobby joes from veganomicon, as the case may be here) with some mac and cheez

chocolate, almond, cranberry bread. this is one of two quick breads. it's wonderful, but i actually liked the other one a bit better. the other one is a pineapple, macadamia nut, coconut job that i didn't even get to take pictures of because i shoved it all in my face before i got the chance.

this is a stew with dumplings. it's super easy, fast, and only takes one pot. what's not to love?

triple threat: seitan, corn pudding-y stuff, and roasted sweet potatoes

seitan fajitas made with chipotle seitan

oh holy hell. these are pumpkin cinnamon buns and they are fucking awesome. the zine is worth it for this recipe alone. f'reals.

hot chocolate puddin.'

caramel apple upside down cake with caramel sauce. oh yeah.

mini apple pie, shown here with vanilla soy delicious and caramel sauce

chipotle chili with polenta dumplings

right. like i said. go get it.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

i've been selling cookies over on etsy for a few months now. business has been pretty good and i've been having fun coming up with season specialties. for autumn, i have three new cookies - pear pecan, pumpkin chip, and apple cider. the apple ciders have been selling very well and they're by far my favorite to both eat and make. they're like a snickerdoodle, but more cinnamon and with a subtle apple flavor - like the apple cinnamon-y-ness of apple cider donuts. mmmm... donuts...

1 cup margarine
1 1/2 cups granulated white sugar
1 tsp vanilla
4 tbsp applecider whipped with 2 tbsp cornstarch
3 cups unbleached white flour
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp cornstarch

2 tbsp cinnamon
4 tbsp granulated white sugar
1 tbsp brown sugar

Preheat your oven to 300 F.
In a large bowl, cream the margarine and sugar together until smooth. Add the vanilla, and the cornstarch/apple cider mixture, and beat until well-mixed.
Add the flour, salt, cinnamon, baking powder, and cornstarch. Stir to combine well.
In a small bowl stir together the granulated sugar, cinnamon and brown sugar.
Roll a piece of dough into a ball about the size of a large walnut. Roll each ball in the cinnamon/sugar mixture until completely coated and place on an ungreased baking sheet. Continue until all the dough is used up. Using the bottom of a glass, press down on each ball until they are about an inch thick. Bake for 12 - 14 minutes. Let cool on the pans for about 5 minutes, and then transfer to a wire baking rack and let cool completely.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

i went to vegan treats today. oh, vegan treats, is there anything you can't do?

i got my requisite coconut cream donut. this is probably one of the best things i have ever put in my mouth. that and the boston cream, but the coconut cream wins out of the boston cream anyday. seriously, people, forget the mighty-o, forget voodoo, forget everything you now about the vegan donut. eat one of these and you'll know what i mean. there are donuts in the perfect sense of the word. dough-y, erm nut-y?, coconut-y, creamy. all of it. in here.

i also got a mini pumpkin cheesecake which was fantastic. like a pumpkin pie mousse. really really tasty stuff.

and i also got a peanut butter chocolate cheesecake. a little too sweet for my tastes, but still very VERY good.

so, i know this post isn't very long and maybe that's cheating, but i wanted to just leave you with the food porn today.

Friday, November 02, 2007

for breakfast today, i had some leftover squash that i had made for halloween.

Stuffed Acorn Squash
makes 8 servings

2 acorn squash
medium onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 T. tamari
1 c whole wheat couscous, dry
1 1/4 c broth
1/2 t. of each of the following: rosemary, sage, thyme, marjoram, oregano
salt and pepper to taste
1/4 c. dried cranberries
1/4 c. chopped walnuts
1/4 c. chopped dried apricots
pomegranate molasses
hoisin sauce

preheat oven to 400. cut squash in half and scoop out seeds. place, cut side down on a parchement lined baking sheet and place in the oven
saute onion and garlic in a small amount of oil until softened. add the tamari and stire for 30 seconds. add the couscous and stir for 1 minute. add the broth, spices, and salt and pepper, bring to a boil (this should happen quickly), stir couscous, cover, and take off heat.
let stand for 5 minutes. add the dried fruit and walnuts to the pot and re-cover for another 5 minutes.
uncover and stir to incorporate everything.
remove squash from the oven. they should be done by now, but if they're not, cook until they are tender.
when squash is finished, take it out of the oven and let it cool for a few minutes, flip them over (be careful not to rip holes in them - they will be soft). fill with the couscous mixture. drizzle pomegranate molasses and hoisin sauce over top. cut each squash in half carefully and serve.
this is especially awesome with sauteed greens on the side. on halloween, i made kale with the tahini sauce from vegan with a vengeance

i had some leftover mexican tacos from yesterday for lunch.

dinner was another attempt at raw. this was my third raw meal and this is the first one that didnt go well. i think i just wasn't in the right frame of mind for it. it's solidly autumn in new jersey and it's been chilly all day. i started eating tonight and i realized that i really wanted something warm. it wasn't that i disliked the meal, i just wasn't into it tonight. anyway, tonight's raw meal was "pasta" alfredo. the pasta consisted of zucchini noodles mixed with red pepper, mushrooms, shallots, tarragon, onion, garlic, jalapeno, and ginger. the alfredo was cashews and macadamia nuts processed with lemon juice and nama shoyu. my food processor is super small and not very strong, so instead of getting a creamy sauce from the nuts, i got more of a pasta. no biggie.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

i know. i know. it's been a long time. too long actually. and it's not like michael and i haven't been traveling, we just haven't been writing.

well, some of the people over on The Post Punk Kitchen decided to do a month of vegan food writing (VeganMoFo) coinciding with NaNoWriMo. so here i am. i'm going to try to blog at least once a day about food. it could be what i've made for dinner (like tonight's entry). it could be some of the stuff i've been selling lately (apple cider cookies anyone?), it could be someplace i've eaten, could be cookbook reviews. whatever. it will be food related. i'm pretty excited about this as i really need to get back into writing and i've been bad about it.

anyway, thanks to katie over at don't eat off the sidewalk for the cool banner. onto the food!

dinner tonight came out of Everyday Vegan by Dreena Burton. It's the Mexican Tofu Tacos with Creamy Dill Dressing and Mexican Nacho Cheese. i got this cookook last year for christmas and after a year of testing a crapload of vegan cookbooks, i'm just now getting around to making some things out of here. i'm not the world's biggest fan of vegan cheese. it's just not right. it's ok melted, but it still kind of squicks me out. the dish as a whole was ok. certainly not bad. i ate it. i will eat what is leftover. i'm just not sure i would make it again. so out of a scale of 0 to 4 mofo's. i'd give it a 1.